Wednesday, September 10, 2008

My three favourite tips

The following three tips or advice are things I have either been told or have discovered on my own that have worked amazingly well:

1. trying to instill a routine or break a bad habit or just make a change or teach your baby something? Put it into practice for 7 days with absolute consistency and you will see results! This was my all time favourite piece of advice, received from my mother a little later then I would have liked after my first child was born. Having this "7 days to salvation" (as I liked to call it) as a focus when dealing with a difficult situation was a life saver, it took the hopelessness out of every situation and gave me the encouragement that what I was doing would show success if I just stuck to it. This has worked so well for me with both of my children. The key is BE CONSISTENT! Give in even once and your in for a set back!

2. As difficult as it is sometimes staying calm and relaxed makes a huge difference in a baby or child’s mood or behaviour. When your temper is flaring, even only on the inside children pick up on this. A baby will likely be cranky or fussy, and a child will act out or defy you. Call me coo coo but you have to try this, the next time you feel like you are getting irritable and frustrated with your child turn away for a moment or however long you need and do the following: Take a deep breath when you exhale imagine the tension leaving you with that breath. Fill yourself with as much love as you can muster for your child, and turn back to approach the situation with this new found calm (and maintain this for the entire process or interaction with the child) imagine until you think you can physically feel it: That your body is radiating about a foot or two in front of you (or however close your child is to you) imaginary vibrations filled with love. Try this and I would put my money on it that the situation just resolved itself with about an eighth of the energy and time it would have taken had you not done it.

3. Patience is key. When you are dealing with children something that can be very frustrating is how long it takes for them to do things like for instance how long it takes your daughter to eat her dinner or how long it takes for the baby to get to sleep, when oh there are so many things you could or should or need to be doing. But when your feeling anxious or wanting to rush things just like the preceding hint- even if it's only inside, your kids will pick up on it. Feeling rushed when putting baby to bed is likely to make it take twice as long, picking up on your anxiety which you are radiating without even knowing it, he is probably going to be unsettled and reluctant to give into his sleepiness. Again take a moment like you did above and just say to yourself(and believe it) that there is nothing that has to be done now that is more important then these moments with your children no matter how long they are lasting. Before you know it the baby will be asleep and your daughter will have finished her dinner.

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2 comments:

ECASH said...

WOW amazing! I read your article just this afternoon while I was battleing to put my 2 year old son down for his nap... I am going to stick with your three words of advice.
Before reading your blog I thought I was the only mom that flies off the handle or gets so frustrated with other things that most moms have such patients for! I feel like I am HUMAN again!!

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